Most of the civilised world loves bureaucracy. We
need birth certificates, ID cards and Passports which tell us who we are. Then
there are the licences we need to work to live or to drive. It is my experience
from my travels around the world that many countries turn it to an art form.
Germany is one such country, not as bad as some, but whole forests of paper are
offered up to this hungry God called Bureaucracy. And woe betide you if you do
not follow this path, or if you loose patience with a “jobs worth”.
Today I had to walk the path of bureaucracy for
Hanna, in order to ensure her Last Will and Testament is finalised. This
involved in the first instance a visit to the “Amtsgericht” or the Court that
deals with Wills and Testaments.
My first hurdle was the security check at the front
door of an imposing building. It is almost worse than that at airports. What
was doubly annoying this morning was though there was no one behind me coming
through, the guard tried to rush me when it came to collect my belongings from
the x-ray machine and get dressed again. The result was that my mobile fell out
of my jacket pocket and into the sum of its constituent parts!
Thankfully the woman that then dealt with me was
pleasant it just took time as she serviced her own personal God, which in her
case was a computer. Her typing was with two fingers, which needless to say
takes longer than with a few more. Once she had everything typed up I was given
a copy and then I have to say, why did it take so long for her to fill in a
very simple form on her computer. I could have written the whole thing out
faster than she filled it in. That’s the trouble with a well established
bureaucracy, there is no room for original thought or improvisation.
From there I walked in the sun to an other
bureaucratic institution a Bank. It was marginally quicker here, another very
pleasant woman (to the eye also) quickly copied what I gave her, said she would
pay the funeral expenses, but that was it. We had to wait for the Courts to do
there stuff.
Then I got on my bike and went to the cemetery to
check that the grave was properly registered as we had some doubts since there
was no mention of it on the final bill from the Undertakers. Nothing untoward
there, the bill for that was sent separately yesterday and we can bury another
coffin (mine) and up to 4 urns on the plot.
The it was off to the stonemasons for a discussion
and tasking and also to the Gardener that had looked after the grave and with
whom I made an appointment at the grave, to discuss how it should be redone
once the soil has settled.
The flowers on the grave are slowly rotting and
returning to the earth, but the candle burned bright even in the daylight.
While standing there and musing on things in general and Hanna in particular, I
was pleasantly surprised by a visitor. One of Hanna’s English students a mature
man called Bernhard. Hanna liked this chap very much as his hobby fascinated
her. He is also a magician and had wanted schooling in his English so he could
also do his tricks in that language. His day job is that of a teacher in a
handicapped children’s school. They had just returned from holiday, which is
why they were not at the funeral.
Hanna would have been pleased at the honour he did
her by visiting the grave.
I was too.
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