Of mice and men

For some time now I have thought that I have been sharing my home with a mouse! This thought came to me not from nibbled packets of food, but from some droppings on my parquet flooring I noticed when hoovering. Last night I saw her/him for the first time. It was such a wee creature and so sweet as it ran hastily away from me out of the bathroom and into my bedroom. I did not chase it but left it alone......... for now. 

How did such a wee creature get into my flat? I live on the fourth floor. The stairs and corridor floors are made of marble and this small creature could surely not have climbed five flights of stairs, assuming it came from the cellar and not the street level. One step alone is taller than the mouse can be, even standing on its hind legs. So perhaps it took the lift?

 My problem now is, should I be a man and set a trap to kill it or should I be a mouse and catch it alive to set it free in Hanna's garden? It seemed so sweet. Already I have been a mouse and fed it some cheese. Just now before I began to write this piece, I set a piece down near where I know it now to be and it has taken it already. Perhaps I should just keep feeding it and keep it as a house pet? But no, I fear it must go, but how; to kill or catch that is the question?

Great British Cooking

Lunch caught by me by the Owen Falls Dam, Jinja, Uganda

 One of my tasks in Uganda in 1983, was to buy all the victuals the Officers' and Sergeants' Messes used. Fresh vegetables and fruit I bought in the local markets, but most meat I bought frozen in Kenya, going once a fortnight to Eldoret and once a month to the NAAFI in Nairobi. Sometimes I did visit the slaughter houses of Kampala, but then I tended to choose the meat while it was still on the hoof to try and ensure I got a healthy animal. 

For the Officers' Mess I was the President of the Mess Committee as well as the Food Member and consequently worked out all the menus. I often supplemented what we ate with the fish I caught in the Nile, as we were based in Jinja right at the source, where the Nile left Lake Victoria.  

2 Nile perch caught before tea.

I ran the Officers' Mess just like any other British Officers' Mess with the corresponding meal times, so we had, breakfast, morning coffee, lunch, tea and dinner in the evenings. Feeding young hungry men, who are away from home, and can not visit pubs or restaurants of their own accord to relieve the monotony of barracks life, is no easy task. The food in the mess was consequently always the highlight of the day and having a cake at tea was too. 

The staff we had, as you can see from the photo were all young men, unskilled, desperate for work, willing to learn and tremendously loyal. When I introduced new dishes to the menu I would often have to give a demonstration to the staff of how to cook it, as though one or two could read English, they did not always understand what the recipe demanded of them. The officers were complementary of my efforts in the kitchen and did remark that when I returned to England I should run a restaurant. Well I never did get to run the restaurant, but I shall be taking English Cooking in English at the local adult education centre next term, which is almost the same thing, since we will all sit down to eat what I teach them to cook at the end of the session. I for one am looking forward to the challenge.

NINE ELEVEN

Where were you on September 11th 2001 and if you are old enough for that matter on November 22nd 1963? Did the events of these days affect your life in anyway? When JFK was assassinated I was a teenager and had been out at a typical 60's party listening to the latest songs of the Beatles. His tragic death did not directly affect my life, nor I suspect most of the people living outside America.  That day changed the way the Secret Service does their business of protecting their President, no more riding around in open cars, now they ride in cars built like tanks.

Ten years ago tomorrow, for me at least, it was late at night and I was sitting in a bar of the hotel and marina on Rebak Island, Malaysia. I had just closed my laptop with which I had sent Hanna an email of my progress since I was still sailing alone around the world. An American yachtie suddenly came running through the bar from his boat in the marina on his way to Reception, demanding in a loud voice immediate access to a phone, as there had been a plane hijack in New York. My initial thought was, typical crazy Yank making himself important, what could he do about a hijack in New York. 

I returned to my boat and switched on my small 14inch TV. Where I was in the marina, reception was poor and at best I could get one decent picture of an English speaking Malaysian TV channel and sometimes up to two other non English speaking channels. The picture I now saw was of a commercial air liner flying into a large skyscraper. Wow I thought, this film could be worth watching. But then I realised I was not watching a film, but an actual event as it was happening on the other side of the world!

Up until that moment and since I started my circumnavigation in August 1998, my world had contracted to the immediate space around me and my yacht. Not much else was really important any more, or so it seemed. Yet prior to me starting my voyage I had been aware what was happening in the world and was even, in a small way as staff officer in a major military headquarters  involved in the first Iraq war. Now though I had not heard of Osama Bin Laden or of Al Qaeda even though I had been living in the worlds largest populated Muslim country for some considerable time.  

When JFK died I was 17 and did not think much beyond what party and with which girl I was going to next week. Now though anyone with half a brain must realise that this  disaster that struck America was going to affect us all and change the world for ever.  John Dunne said it first,

"No man is an island entire of itself; every man 

is a piece of the continent, a part of the main; 

if a clod be washed away by the sea, 

Europe is the less, as well as if a promontory were, 

as well as a manor of thy friends or of thine  own were;

any man's death diminishes me,  because I am involved in mankind.  

And therefore never send to know for whom  the bell tolls; 

it tolls for thee." 

Women's Football

The FIFA Volunteers signed shirt.

Have you been watching the FIFA Women's World Cup? I am a FIFA Volunteer in the Mönchengladbach stadium so I have seen one live game so far and a number of others on the TV. I have also been following the whole thing in the news as well as observing how the people in my town are reacting to it all.

The thing that strikes me most is the inequality of the way the German public are supporting the German team compared to the way they supported the  male team, and I wonder how it is in your country? In 2006, when the men's World Cup was held in Germany and again in 2010 when it was held in South Africa, almost every car  and house sprouted flags. Since I live in Germany I decided to wholly support the German team and was one of the first to hang a flag on a pole from my balcony and, something I did not do in 2006 and 2010, placed two flags on my car! Few members of the general public have done the same, though the atmosphere in the stadium was, to my mind second to none.

What also disturbs me is the way most men view women's football. They generally denigrate it in comparison to the male game, as well as come out with chauvinistic expressions which they assume are jokes and so we should all laugh. I for one do not. 

FIFA Volunteer Team 7

The women, at best are sadly only semi professional as there is not enough money (yet) in the game to support them professionally. That they nonetheless show great fitness and skill on the field, while holding down a day job as well, is a credit to them. Yet somehow it seems expected of women, just like wives and mothers are expected to be a nurse, child minder, housekeeper, cook and bottle washer and when the lights go out a concubine as well. Where do they get their determination and energy from? 

We should remember that women's football, compared to the male version, is still in its infancy. Many countries do not have many league teams, or systems in place to encourage and train young women. But it is on its way. Already this year I have noticed a marked improvement in the way women play the game compared to last year, at the U20 Women's World Cup.

Clearly the male version of the game in all our countries serves as a role model to boys and men alike. In many cases the professional footballer, (David Beckham for example) is also a sex symbol to young women and girls. This is perhaps why it has a bigger appeal. The women though are equally tough (just witness the way Nigeria tackled Germany) and are equally good role models for our girls and young women. As fathers we should perhaps encourage our daughters to watch these games more and even to play the game. The determination, fitness, and the robustness needed to play the game will stand our women in good stead in the game of life.

So come on chaps, before these championships are over, get behind the women of your country and  support your team and stop the male chauvinistic jokes and reporting in the newspapers.

Some Mothers

The expression, “some mothers’ do ‘ave ‘em!” is a more or less derogatory expression meant to indicate a weird or odd person is the off spring of the mother. It was also the title of a popular sitcom on BBC TV in the 70’s staring Michael Crawford.

I have been reminded of this expression by my observations of certain mothers over the years and especially recently and the manner in which they educate and bring up their off spring, but especially their sons. The relationship between mothers and sons was even a subject for a recent BBC radio series. Sadly they only touched on the positive aspects and not the negative ones where mothers do their damndest to mould and control their sons in all things the whole of their life. A “mother’s boy” is also a derogatory expression for a boy that is timid and weak, always clean and obedient. Mother’s boys are made and not born that way.

All of us are the product of our parents and their upbringing, plus the sum of our experience. We are fortunate if we do not have a heavy baggage of upbringing to carry through life.

Some people believe that a baby is born as a blank sheet of paper, upon which we adults write. To me this is only partly true. I believe that children are born with their inherent nature, which is the sum of their parents’ genes within them. If their parents are introvert, timid and shy, socially inadept, the chances are the children will be too. On the other hand if the parents are extrovert, brave as lions, intelligent then the child should be as well. I further believe that development of a baby's character starts in the womb. If the baby is subjected to loud noise or music, if the mother is prone to fits of shouting and screaming when arguing, then I believe this will affect the character of the child even before birth. Should the birth be traumatic for either mother or baby, then I think that too will affect its character. Then there is the matter of the actual upbringing which does not make all things equal either. We parents carry around with us the heavy baggage of our own upbringing and more often than not, end up instilling it into the new born.

Children are not born with a value system in their genes. They do not know the difference between right and wrong, hot and cold, good and evil, black and white. Children do not know what prejudice or hate is. This all needs to be learned. But they are I believe, born with an infinite capacity to love, though again they need to be shown how to love someone.

The Jesuits said with truth, “give me a child until it is seven and I will give you the man” because they understood that small children until they are seven are like blotting paper. They are so trusting they soak up every little detail of their upbringing and their environment. This is the time when the value system is learned. It is the most critical stage in the life of any person. If we adults get it wrong, it can lead to the formation of trauma and other deep problems, such as the development of prejudice and hate, the child being good or bad, or prone to violence, all of  which will take years to correct, if it can be corrected at all.

I have watched mothers incensed with hygiene continually scrub their little ones for fear they may be dirty. And to have a dirty child is a reflection, they think, of them as a mother! I have seen fathers incensed with a desire for discipline treat their children like soldiers, to be obedient in all things especially trivial things, from a very young age. I have seen fathers duck their small child continually under the water, “teaching it to swim”. Hanna was all set to do this particular large Russian bully father physical harm, but fortunately for all he stopped in time because he was hungry!  I watch mothers who are timid and insecure themselves, hover around their child when playing on the playground apparatus, making it doubly timid in turn. Were it to stumble and fall they are there immediately to worry it and they seem unable to differentiate between a harmless scratch, for which a child can be hardened and a serious injury. Yet at the same time they seem incapable of teaching their child to love or show any form of affection. Some mothers even think their child is their personal possession, and forget that it is a small human being that is merely on loan to them.

Each child is unique and there are consequently no user manuals on how to bring up any particular child. Countless books on the subject do abound of course, but they are all generalisations and a guide at best. All new parents are treading for them, new ground. They wish to do their best, to even correct what is perceived as the faults in their own upbringing and so mistakes are made. Some will have long term consequences and we can only hope that as these children grow into adults they themselves can overcome the majority of them. Insha’Allah!

An eye for an eye!

One of my father’s favourite expressions was, “it’s humans that have stuffed up this world!” Slowly I am coming to agree with him. Man is a violent animal and the only one on earth that harbours hate and revenge in his heart. Many prophets down the ages have also known this and by giving man laws and regulations have attempted to try and regulate him. Moses tried his best. In Exodus Ch. 21 verses 21 to 25 he attempted to regulate the violence by advocating a like for like style of punishment. An eye for an eye. I think the point many of us have missed is that here he is advocating that within the social system of the time it is like for like.  Should a slave holder poke out the eye of his slave then he must be given his freedom, not that the slave may poke out the eye of his master. In Leviticus Ch. 19 verse 18 Moses advocates to “love thy neighbour!” Something that gets forgotten until Jesus tells us in his Sermon on the Mount. (Mathew Ch. 5 v. 44) to, "love your enemies". Moses qualifies his eye for an eye rule later in Leviticus Ch. 24 verses 19-22 to include one’s enemies as well. The idea here is to limit the retribution, not to increase it.

Mohamed in the Qur’an (Sura 5 verse 45 to 47) repeats more or less what Moses said before him. To my mind he is also attempting to limit man’s quest for revenge, to keep it within bounds. Yet along the way they have all forgotten the fifth Commandment, “thou shalt not kill/murder!” Jesus in his Sermon on the Mount (Mathew Ch. 5 v. 3 to 48) gave man a better system of justice and compassion, for not only did he remind man not to kill but to turn the other cheek, perhaps the hardest thing of all to do.

Since the Munich disaster in 1972, Israel has pursued a policy of, “an eye for an eye”. Their going after the terrorists that planned and executed the Munich hostage taking took state condoned violence to a new level and was clearly the example for America to handle the way they did with Osama bin Laden. That these terrorists deserved to be punished is not at dispute here. Nor do I dispute the need to go after them wherever they may be. There must be no hiding place for terrorists. I mentioned in an earlier Blog that terrorism is a crime against us all and we must hunt these terrorists down wherever they are and bring them to justice before proper courts of law. That is the only way for a civilised society to respond.

To my mind the “eye for an eye” policy of retribution merely breeds more hatred and desire for revenge and then into following generations, which is why we are hardly ever to have peace in the Middle East.

I am caused to make these remarks by the horrid thought that the Judges in Iran have given Ameneh Bahrami the right to pour acid into the eyes of the man who did the same to her. That they have placed Majid Movahedi, the man in question, in a state prison hospital and that there are doctors who will assist or even carry out this (new crime) punishment horrifies me. What about the doctor’s Hippocratic Oath? As I write the authorities have thankfully postponed the punishment. That crimes against women often go unpunished in many cultures is a shame on that society and should not be condoned. That Majid Movahedi committed a heinous crime which must be punished severely, also as a deterrent to other men who contemplate such acts, goes almost without saying. But that we should descend into barbarism to do so must offend all civilised men and women.

I fear that Ameneh Bahrami has added fuel to the fire of hate and will herself become another victim of revenge and retribution by the family of Majid Movahedi. She will need to be looking over her shoulder for the rest of her life.

Mahatma Gandhi was right when he reputedly said that, “an eye for and eye makes the whole world blind.

Osama Bin Laden

So America have finally killed Osama Bin Laden, but as usual I think they have gone about it all wrong. The World is not the Wild West and America has no right to go trampling on the sovereignty of other nations. Yes they have killed a man that deserved to die, but by shooting him in this manner they have given him not just a martyrs death, but have raised him to be a hero in the eyes of young muslim fanatics. They can now say that Osama died fighting the Great Devil America, that he never gave up.

I believe that terrorism is a crime against humanity,  it is a crime against all of us, whether the bomb goes off in New York, Marrakesh, Bali, Baghdad, Madrid or London matters not, we are all involved. We all have the right to travel where we will and so could be involved whether we like it or not. Hanna and I once missed being killed in a terrorist attack by  less than 24 hours. We had stood in the same place where later French tourists and others were killed.

Terrorists are therefore criminals and MUST be treated as such. They should not be treated like enemy soldiers in a conventional war. Doing so gives them an honour they do not deserve, for they tend to hide behind innocent people,  and they use and kill women and children. America should have copied Israel, for here they showed the way when they kidnapped Adolf Eichmann in Argentina and took him back to Israel to stand a public trial. Osama Bin Laden was a criminal and should have been captured alive, taken to New York and put on trial for his crimes there. Found guilty he should have been hanged by the neck until dead and then buried in the prison cemetery in an unmarked grave. This is they way one deals with criminals and it is not a martyrs death to die in this way. Yes he would have been able to speak his mind, but should a great democracy fear rhetoric? I say no. Remember how sad Saddam Hussein, and Adolf Eichmann looked at their trials, they did not look like martyrs or heros, they looked exactly what they were criminals, deserving of the full punishment of the law.

It is sad and pathetic too, to watch people dancing in the streets at the killing of one man as if the war is over. It is not over, it is perhaps, as Churchill might have said, not the end, it is the end of the beginning. Insha'allah!